It’s Tough Playing Beer League Hockey

After watching HBO’s 24/7 with the Penguins and the Capitals, I realized that the referees in the NHL take a lot more crap from players than the beer league refs would tolerate. NHL refs get cursed at constantly without dishing out any further penalties. A beer league player might only question a call and get a misconduct. So, if it’s really true that NHL refs are more tolerant of being cursed at than beer league refs, then that should be number 11 on the list of Ten Ways Beer League Hockey Is Harder Than the NHL.

Looking Back on a Decade of Hockey

It’s been more than ten years since the group of people now known as the Screaming Squirrels started skating together on a rag-tag roller hockey team at the Gardens Ice House in Laurel. In that time, the Squirrels have played roller hockey each summer, and started ice in late 2003. As you can imagine, players have several memories of their time with the Squirrels over the years.

“Feeding the puck to Rob for the championship-winning goal against Dog Star will always be my highlight,” says Matt Borlik, who started with the team in 2002 as a backup goaltender. His runner-up memory? “Runner-up is meeting Tom and Rob for the first time at a pickup rink and nearly getting in a fight with Tom (who apparently was a like an Army Ranger or something). Then somehow getting invited to the Squirrels as a backup goalie a week later (I forget how that happened), meeting the team, and finding out Tom was the captain.” Yes, that’s how Matt met us.

Mike Bronson, who played with the ice team for three seasons before darting off to Chicago, also has several favorite moments. “Dan Carter bringing a new girlfriend around to every season. That big win over Scurvy of course. The same season we played Scurvy we played the Cruisers. We hadn’t won all season (I think we tied Laughing Skulls). I got in a fight with some of those douchey twins on that team and we ended up pulling out the victory.”

Bronson, who also got into a fight and got suspended for three games in his first season with the Squirrels, was also fond of the game where he frustrated the Vikings, including one of their to players who was on the verge of tears.

Personally, my favorite Squirrels moment was winning our first non-shared roller championship in 2005, and winning our first underdog ice championship in 2006.

For those who need a reminder, the first roller championship in 2003 was technically shared. For some reason, the league thought it was a good idea to make the championship game best-of-three. The Squirrels easily won Game One, but the Hurricanes somehow won Game Two. Game Three was canceled because Hurricane Isabel tore through the region.

The Squirrels also won their first ice championship on 2004 in the beginner league, but they were undefeated that year and it was pretty much a cake walk, as was the 2010 ice championship.

The Squirrels also had many off-ice memorable moments, particularly Phil Van der Vossen’s wedding and the years team parties that ended in D.C.

Here’s to another decade of the Screaming Squirrels.

Squirrels Shut Out Again

Offense continued to be the Squirrels’ major problem Sunday as a full bench couldn’t squeak a shot past Scurvy in a 3-0 loss. Scurvy, however, did bring up a mid-season ringer, who wasn’t even on the roster and had to be pulled aside during the game to be verified, while contributing two goals in his only game of the season.

The Gardens IH – Patrick      Sun, Dec 19, 2010 at 3:47 pm
Squirrels 0 Scurvy II 3
Game Details
Scoring Shots on Goal
1 2 3 Total
Screaming Squirrels 0 0 0 0
Scurvy II 1 0 2 3
Squirrels 17
Scurvy II 21
Scoring Summary
Period 1
Scurvy IIAri Eagle (unassisted) , 3:55
Period 2
(no scoring)
Period 3
Scurvy IIScott Striegel (unassisted) , 2:24
Scurvy IIAri Eagle (unassisted) , 10:38
Penalties
Period 1
Screaming SquirrelsRobert Valdes – (Tripping Minor), 2 min , 9:35
Screaming SquirrelsRobert Myers – (Slashing Minor), 2 min , 13:03
Period 2
Scurvy IIDavid Ditch – (Unsportsmanlike Conduct Minor), 2 min , 6:04
Screaming SquirrelsRobert Myers – (Tripping Minor), 2 min , 8:38
Screaming SquirrelsBrent Machado – (Holding Minor), 2 min , 14:02
Period 3
Scurvy IIDavid Ditch – (Tripping Minor), 2 min , 7:12
Screaming SquirrelsRobert Myers – (Slashing Minor), 2 min , 10:38
Scurvy IIJay Costenbader – (Roughing Minor), 2 min , 13:34
Screaming SquirrelsMichael Ricci – (Roughing Minor), 2 min , 13:34
Scurvy IIJay Costenbader – (Unsportsmanlike Conduct Minor), 2 min , 13:34
Rosters
Screaming Squirrels Scurvy II
Goalies
Name Min Shots Saves
30 Eric Coulson 45 21 18
Name Min Shots Saves
0 Sub S Tougas 45 17 17
Players
# Name G A PTS PIM GWG
1 Mark Tessar 0 0 0 0 0
4 Chi Pham 0 0 0 0 0
5 Robert Valdes 0 0 0 2 0
7 Doug Winters 0 0 0 0 0
8 John Burke 0 0 0 0 0
9 Charles Wolstein 0 0 0 0 0
10 Brent Machado 0 0 0 2 0
12 Anthony Richelsen 0 0 0 0 0
16 Michael Ricci 0 0 0 2 0
18 Robert Myers 0 0 0 6 0
19 Benjamin Sumner 0 0 0 0 0
22 Jeffrey Bobeck 0 0 0 0 0
61 Tero Moberg 0 0 0 0 0
# Name G A PTS PIM GWG
8 Jay Costenbader 0 0 0 4 0
14 Dave Stephens 0 0 0 0 0
17 Thomas Robertson 0 0 0 0 0
22 Scott Striegel 1 0 1 0 0
26 Ari Eagle 2 0 2 0 1
30 Robert Borthwick 0 0 0 0 0
37 Gregory Lauer 0 0 0 0 0
55 Jeff Kagan 0 0 0 0 0
66 David Ditch 0 0 0 4 0
95 Spencer Berk 0 0 0 0 0
Other facts
Referee
Default Referee, Brian Antkowiak, Phil DakeScorekeeper
Amanda Kozay

Squirrels 7, Laughing Skulls 1

With only three subs on the bench, the Screaming Squirrels were in desperate need of goals and a win after a recent slump. And they got it.

With only two true defensemen in the lineup, the Squirrels moved forward Jeff Bobeck back to skate with Tony Richelsen and Doug Winters. That worked fine as the Squirrels limited the Skulls to 18 shots with Eric Coulson turning away 17 of them.

Brent Machado got the scoring started in the first period, but the shifts were long and the Squirrels knew there was a lot more time left. The Skulls goaltender, Shane Smith, made many great saves and kept the Squirrels moving by playing the puck instead of allowing the face-off, which would’ve enabled the Squirrels to catch their breath.

The second period ended up being even better for the Squirrels as Mark Tessar (from the roller team) scored in the first game back on the ice in several years. Tony Richelsen added another late in the period and the Squirrels took a 3-1 lead into the third period.

But the Skulls struck back as Vincent Barracchini’s individual effort cut the lead to 3-1.

Then Smith made a mistake. Skating out of the crease to clear the puck, he hit it right to Machado, who wristed a shot into an empty net, deflating the Skulls. A few minutes later, Machado completed the hat trick, then Doug Winters did his Mike Green at-his-best impression with some sort of spinorama move. Richelsen scored again shortly after, and it appeared he had scored once more from behind the blue line but the play was called offsides. Regardless, the Skulls weren’t happy that Smith had let in the shot, though it ended up helping the Skulls because the faceoff went into the Squirrels’ zone.

With just a few seconds remaining, Bobeck got into a minor scuffle with someone, but Barracchini took exception and clobbered Bobeck from behind. Barracchini is about a foot taller and 100 pounds heavier than Bobeck and literally blindsided him. The refs ended the game on the play, giving Barracchini a five minute major and game misconduct.

The Gardens IH – Patrick      Sat, Dec 11, 2010 at 9:22 pm
Squirrels 7 Laughing Skulls 1
Game Details
Scoring Shots on Goal
1 2 3 Total
Screaming Squirrels 1 2 4 7
Laughing Skulls 0 0 1 1
Squirrels 27
Laughing Skulls 18
Scoring Summary
Period 1
Screaming SquirrelsBrent Machado (Doug Winters) , 12:20
Period 2
Screaming SquirrelsMark Tessar (Brent Machado, Benjamin Sumner) , 5:30
Screaming SquirrelsAnthony Richelsen (unassisted) , 13:33
Period 3
Laughing SkullsVincent Barracchini (unassisted) , 3:13
Screaming SquirrelsBrent Machado (unassisted) , 6:29
Screaming SquirrelsBrent Machado (John Burke) , 9:06
Screaming SquirrelsDoug Winters (unassisted) , 10:26
Screaming SquirrelsAnthony Richelsen (Jeffrey Bobeck) , 11:59
Penalties
Period 1
(no penalties)
Period 2
Screaming SquirrelsBrent Machado – (Body Checking Minor), 2 min , 8:17
Laughing SkullsPeter Gruhn – (Body Checking Minor), 2 min , 8:40
Laughing SkullsPaul Keys – (High Sticking Minor), 2 min , 10:43
Laughing SkullsJames Ningen – (Body Checking Minor), 2 min , 12:18
Screaming SquirrelsJeffrey Bobeck – (Elbowing Minor), 2 min , 12:18
Period 3
Laughing SkullsVincent Barracchini – (Charging Major), 5 min , 14:54
Laughing SkullsVincent Barracchini – (Charging Game Misconduct), 10 min , 14:54
Screaming SquirrelsJeffrey Bobeck – (Interference Minor), 2 min , 14:54
Rosters
Screaming Squirrels Laughing Skulls
Goalies
Name Min Shots Saves
30 Eric Coulson 45 18 17
Name Min Shots Saves
35 Shane Smith 45 27 20
Players
# Name G A PTS PIM GWG
7 Doug Winters 1 1 2 0 0
8 John Burke 0 1 1 0 0
10 Brent Machado 3 1 4 2 0
12 Anthony Richelsen 2 0 2 0 0
16 Mark Tessar 1 0 1 0 1
19 Benjamin Sumner 0 1 1 0 0
22 Jeffrey Bobeck 0 1 1 4 0
61 Tero Moberg 0 0 0 0 0
# Name G A PTS PIM GWG
3 Mike Ohanian 0 0 0 0 0
4 Patrick Herwig 0 0 0 0 0
7 James Ningen 0 0 0 2 0
18 Douglas Church 0 0 0 0 0
19 Christopher Tucker 0 0 0 0 0
024 Nate Heard 0 0 0 0 0
24 Vincent Barracchini 1 0 1 15 0
39 Anthony Campanella 0 0 0 0 0
49 Peter Gruhn 0 0 0 2 0
54 Michael Davis 0 0 0 0 0
77 Paul Keys 0 0 0 2 0
Other facts
Referee
Default Referee, Larry Bertrand, Justin RalstonScorekeeper
Terri Ball

Squirrels Trade Gassert to Chicago

In a move that surprised no one, the Screaming Squirrels traded ice and roller defender to Chicago for future considerations. Gassert has only been with the team for a little more than a year, but it seemed like 10. In his first season, he helped the Squirrels win the 2009-10 ice championship. He then skated on the roller team, before rejoining the ice team for the first half of this season. Aside from playing defense, Gassert’s main role with the team was to ask who is bringing the beer.

Roller Squirrel Mark Tessar will replace Gassert on the roster. Also, Gassert’s brother, Wes Gassert, is expected to join the roller team, and eventually the ice team. Gassert will be joining former Squirrel Mike Bronson in the windy city, where they are expected to be bunking together.

In completely unrelated news, Scurvy traded Alicia Krawitz and a broken Alex Ovechkin hockey stick to Chicago for future considerations.

Gassert Stats

Year (Div) GP G A PTS PP SH PIM
2010/2011 Ice 8 2 1 3 1 0 8
2010 Inline 14 12 12 24 4 0 15
2009/2010 Ice 20 5 5 10 3 0 12